How to Gossip!
Well, we all thought that gossiping is natural and total walk in the park. Well, news flash! It is a very intricate task to handle. One has to be careful, skilled, communicative in all possible ways and very tactful. Here are the basic rules to good gossiping!
Nick-names: The safest bet for gossiping is to use nick-names for people. This is to ensure that you are not really “bad mouthing”. However, make sure the nick names are unique for all your subjects. They have to be carved in a manner that they obviously point out to the targeted individual. At the same time, the creative heads around can add a tag line to the nick name. It helps make gossip juicier without much effort.
Confidence: Always remember, good gossip has to be completely believable on face value alone. A true blooded gossip girl (or guy) will not need to give proof or alibis for any gossip that they may churn out. For this, you need to be absolutely confident of the gossip to put “out her”. We need to learn to be able to lie, or say the truth with the most convincing poker face in order to convince the audience of what we tell them
Controverse yourself: The most important part of gossip, is to be doing it on the sly. The best way to never be doubted is to churn out and indirectly spread some random and not-so-important gossip about yourself as well. This will not only remove you from the suspected gossip girl (or guy) list, but also make you feel the importance and lime light that only a target can feel otherwise. What is life without a few twists and some spice, right?
Well, I hope these 3 simple points help you gossip better. You know you love me… XO XO!!
How To Talk To Your Teenager
Teenagers can be tricky. They follow different modes forms of communication. There are no fixed norms or rules to dealing with teenagers. It is important to understand their vibes, the body language, etc. Knowing and understanding their mindset is the key.
Open and broad-minded communication. As parents of teenagers, it's very important to be able to talk about things that really relate to them. Keep track of the music they listen to. While you do that, however, don't try to comment on the music or talk to them using slang. Your children are aware of your age and they will hate it if you try to sound like a wannabe teenager. What many parents often forget is that children love you with all of your weird quirks. So just be yourself. Show inquisitiveness in a constructive manner. You will be surprised at how much you can learn from them.
Don't patronize them. Nobody likes to be patronized. Whenever you are in a conversation with your teenager, make sure that you don't just agree with them to please them. It's more fun when family time conversations have a light debate going on. Try to avoid yelling, but do not shy away from disagreeing with them. This often helps you to understand their point of view better.
Give their ideas, suggestions and theories a fair trial. Teenagers always like to try out their new ideas; they like to experiment. Listen to their theories. If needed, suggest ways for them to come to conclusions or carry on with their analysis. Remember, you have the benefit of experience, but do not forget that times have changed. So put forth your experiences and help them draw their own conclusions. Make sure that you don't enforce your conclusions and opinions on them. Even if they fail, steer clear of the phrase "I told you so." They hate it, and in the future they might hesitate to discuss things with you.
Don't, under any circumstances, invade their privacy. Teenagers are often very private about their rooms, maybe even more about their diaries and journals. Do not go through them to find out what is going on in their life. If something is bothering you, talk to them. Going through their personal belongings has two disadvantages:
1) If they find out that you've been going through their stuff, they will get angry and will become even more secretive. Then, communication will become even tougher, because they will lose trust in you.
2) Teenagers don't always write the exact facts in their diary, and what they do write may be for reasons other than the obvious. You'll just end up getting hassled over inconsequential matters.
Step into their shoes when trying to fathom their behavior. Every person has a set of thoughts and beliefs that leads them into behaving in a certain way. Nobody knows your child better than you. If some particular behavior leads you to doubt them, start thinking like them. Step into their shoes. Teenagers have a lot going on in their lives - peer pressure, school politics, trouble with friends, crushes, etc. When they try to deal with it, they will get stressed out. Don't jump to "all-is-lost" conclusions. There is always more than that which meets the eye. Be patient. They will come to you if they can't deal with it.
Always remember that they are smarter than you can comprehend. Teenagers are very smart, even when they lead people to believe they are not. This is an innately human characteristic. The mind continuously evolves, and it is no different for your teenagers. It is in your nature to look out for them constantly. However, while doing so, most parents start believing that their children are not smart enough to handle things on their own. You think "They are just kids. What do they know about life"? Believe it or not, they know quite a bit. Look out for them, but stay out of their way. You cannot keep doing things for them forever. They won't get a chance to learn to live if you keep constantly stepping in to bail them out. It's like teaching a child to ride a bike. You can hold on to the back for a while, but you have to let go sometime. Even if it means letting them fall a few times. No one learns to ride without a few falls, right?
Teenagers are complicated; nonetheless, understanding them can be a fairly simple task if you understand the fact that they are smart, responsible and individuals by themselves. Too many restrictions often cause a rebellious nature to get exposed. Parents have to be open to the fact that times have changed since they (the parents) were teenagers and the human race has evolved. The best you can do for your child is give them a loving atmosphere at home, making sure you have their trust and they have yours, have their back for a while, and beyond that, hope for the best. You are the parents--whenever they come across something that they can't handle, they will come back to you.
Written for HowToDoThings.com
Admissions Essay Example
This is an admissions Essay I had written for an applicant at Princeton. It was a general essay on a phrase that was given to him.
"Empathy is not simply a matter of trying to imagine what others are going through, but having the will to muster enough courage to do something about it. In a way, empathy is predicated upon hope." Very true a statement. Over the years, as a human habit, we have all understood and perceived the meaning of empathy to be “imagining and understanding another person’s predicament”. However, have we forgotten the true meaning and essence of empathy? Have we as a civilization gotten so caught up in our own daily ruts that we fail to be able to actually live up the term?
May be we have just succumb to a meaning of convenience. However, empathy is what society and the world truly needs today. We all see images and videos on facebook and youtube of people living in under-developed and developing countries. We all make it a point to share how sad their predicament may be. But, what are we collectively doing about it? Yes, we all feel bad for those who do not lead a life that may not be as convenient as ours. But, do we ever sit down and think “what can I do to help make things better for others?”
Many would say that it makes no difference. What change can one man or woman make? Or, that is society. There is nothing we can do about it. The fact, however, remains that we find it hard to imagine that we can be effective. We find it easy and comfortable to live believing that we don’t make a difference, and so we can go on living a life that suits us.
The fact remains that we do not have the courage to stand up and say “yes, I am an individual, and I will make a difference.” Need we be reminded of one man in India, who through his many efforts brought about a change that no army could manage to? He, through his ability to bring logic to peoples’ mind, and strong oration over threw the British rule in India and created history. That man was courageous. He was Mahatma Gandhi. Yes, that needs courage. That needs empathy. That needs hope.
A very important ingredient in the recipe of courage is indeed hope. If we do not believe that we can succeed, if we do not hope that we will get our way, we will never be able to muster the courage to do the tough, right thing. Hope is the one string that is said to hold courage’s head high. Hope is what we need in order to keep faith. Hope is the basis of unconditional love, patriotism and empathy. Yes, hope is the foundation of it all.
There is but one way to end this essay. We could carry on a conversation for ours, but the point is simple and stated, "Empathy is not simply a matter of trying to imagine what others are going through, but having the will to muster enough courage to do something about it. In a way, empathy is predicated upon hope."
This person was selected!!
Statement of Purpose Essay Example
This is an example of an SOP I had written for a friend. Important details have been replaced by stars (**).
"When I was at the age of 7 years, my father gave me a simple piece of advice. He said, “Son, the ones who truly succeed, are the ones who have the power to inspire and the humility to get inspired.” I believe that design is one of the few phenomena in the world that can help a person to have this power and the humility that it entails. I started seeing new meaning in ‘Lego blocks” and “play-clay”. I stopped following the instructions on the manuals. I started to improvise and innovate. Soon I found that I enjoyed making trucks and cars more than I enjoyed building the regular multi story buildings. My improvisation and (even though amateur) vision started to help me succeed in whichever endeavour I undertook. I developed a keen artistic eye and saw colour in the transparency of the light around me. Design became the focus and purpose of my life. I excelled at all that would lead me to the place which will turn my ambitions into reality- ***
I was always amongst the top students in art and design, since school days, and continued to do so even during my graduation. Since, I was always interested automotive design; I wanted to pursue my master in transport design in one of the best institutions, ***. I believe that *** will, truly, broaden my horizons and give me the wings and strength that I need to take flight and fly high. I honestly believe that with my talents and the training that *** can provide me with, I can be a thorough asset for my dream company - **. Since, my college years, I dreamt of working for ** and being a part of their design team. From all that I have read, heard and known over the past few years, I have come to know and trust that the education at *** would be the best for my knowledge development that would be required to learn about transport design. The work done at *** has always inspired me and, to me, it has always been the best. In fact, it is at *** that, one will find, the best in the student is brought out and developed to completion.
Having excelled at several extra-curricular activities during my student life, I have complete faith in my abilities to do justice to that which *** expects of its students. Being an ace sports player since a very young age, competitiveness and team-skills have become a part of my lifestyle. I believe that best type of motivation, is self-motivation and, at that, I work constantly. It stands true that life is a strict teacher, and so might be the case with ***, as well. But, I am very well equipped with the patience and the humility to take up every challenge that comes along my way. I am sure that by the end of the course I will be one of the chosen ones to have the right to call myself a “proud ***ian”.
I am often asked why I chose design as my career path. It is not just because of my natural inclination toward it or my artistic lineage. I believe, “Design” is the perfect mirror of what a person truly is. No matter how old or how young. The status and standing hold no matter. Design can instantly show what the person is and what they have the ability to be. It has the power to make an entity into an identity. I believe that it has to be nurtured and not garnished to bring it to its true glory. I read (and completely agree) that design is a form of problem-solving. Unlike math, or any other subject, in design there is never a single correct solution. You can have as many solutions as the number of people in the world. Everyone has different and a unique approach to solve a design problem, it’s all about the creativity and vision. The fact about design, which truly “got me”, was that in design it’s just not the style or looks that matter. It is, in fact, the function and the base that have to be strong, as well.
I am aware of the heritage and the respect that the brand of *** carries. It was not a brochure or an advertisement which led me into applying at your esteemed institute, but the fact that your vision brings my future in sight. After years of preparing for this application, and several “you are an asset” statements from the organizations that I handled several projects for, I can assure you that I will be one of your most hard working students. Nothing would honour me more than an opportunity to make my dreams and ambitions come true with the esteemed guidance from ***."
P.S: This friend of mine got selected!!